Bras

Why is it, when you have small boobs, it's fun to shop for a bra, but when you have large boobs, it's this terrible, time-consuming, heart-wrenching experience?

Bras as accessories (for small boobs) are so cute. Like, AA-B cups.

They're different colors, with lace and all that crap.

Bras that are FUNCTIONAL, as in, there will be an incident if I do not wear a bra, are ugly.

If I don't wear a bra...

They're all beige or white or black. And, they're kept in boxes.

Girls with big boobs know what I'm talking about.

You see a cute bra, you say, "aww, that's cute..."

what's the next thing out of your mouth?

"...and, it would cover my nipple. Next."

when I finally find one with a tag that says it's the right size, it's not over.

Somehow, most bras have this power to take nice, round boobs, and fashion them into torpedos. No thank you.

I HATE fitting rooms...3 mirrors...holy hell.

So now I just make my son put a cup on his head. If it fits, I buy it.