Sorry, pandas

Did you know that there's a bamboo shortage in China?
what? you don't know that?
well, there is. And pandas are dying off because they eat bamboo, and there's not enough for them.

last week my mom got a chair mat for her office, you know, so her rolly chair can glide on the carpet? well, it's made of bamboo.
that's kind of fucked up, isn't it?

sorry, pandas.

sorry you're starving, but my mom doesn't want wheel marks on her carpet.

but you know what, pandas? how about you try not being so picky? you live in CHINA for God's sake, and Chinese food is freaking awesome.

Your buddy over at Panda Express looks like he's doing alright...